Thinking it and Doing it

Having crossed the scary bridge on Sark. (Picture Roger Hyland)

Thinking it and doing it are two very different activities.  Thinking it is fun.  Doing it is graft. Why is there such a big gap between imagination and action and why is that bridge so hard to cross?

 

I love learning.  Learning new stuff is exciting, a voyage of discovery.  Then there’s putting into practice the things you’ve learned.  That’s harder.  In some cases we never make that transition from learning it to doing it. 

So why is that?  Is it laziness?  Why am I stopping myself from doing the things I tell myself I want to do?

When I was a child I decided to be a writer.  And I just kept writing, so I was a writer. I worked hard.  I kept going. Eventually,  I became a published author.  Why can’t I transfer this determination to other things I want to do? 

I gave up singing because I never practiced enough between lessons, but I still fantasised about singing in concerts and shows, pictured myself standing there and wowing the crowd.  Ha!  Recently I had a lesson after a 20 year gap.  I loved it and got a real buzz, and I’ve started to think about all the songs I want to do but have I practised?  I think you know the answer. 

Today I went for a run.  I’m making exceedingly slow progress considering I took it up over a year ago.  I frustrate myself with my lack of willpower, still picturing a future me with a svelte frame and bags of energy.  The health benefits should be motivation enough.

It’s not that I don’t run, or never practised at all.  I’m inconsistent with my efforts and all too easily make excuses for myself.

So, back to the writing.  Well, now I apply the same lack of consistency to this, too.  Marketing is fun.  Blogging, part of the marketing, is also fun.  Writing a novel is hard work. I compare writing a novel to building a house.  Laying the foundations, stacking the bricks – that’s hard slog.  But decorating the house – that’s the fun part.  Like promoting the novel.  It’s great to play with categories and tinker with search keywords, and experiment with social media.  More fun than laying bricks.

I’m not playing down the importance of marketing – I love marketing and it’s been my job for over 25 years.  I just find it easier than writing a novel.  That’s how I see it. 

Do you prefer building your house or decorating it?

Related post: http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/the-art-of-time-management.html

Hitting 1000

Apparently, most blogs have an average of  less than 1000 views monthly and lots of writers give up blogging and become disillusioned.  Perhaps that is connected with the fact that most writers need some form of validation, be this publication or readers, or some other form of recognition.

I can understand this and there are plenty of times I've nearly given up.  However, looking back to the time when I set up the blog, when I had about 10 views a month, and to the present time, when I average 1500 I do feel that the hard work is worthwhile.  And above all, I enjoy blogging.

Below are links to some great posts about writing and blogging.  I especially enjoyed Nathan Bransford and his observations about writers and vlaidation and striving.

http://blog.nathanbransford.com/2011/02/writing-striving-and-great-gatsby.html

 http://www.yourwriterplatform.com/blog-post-blunders/

http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/05/first-steps-small-steps.html

First Steps, Small Steps

I've just realised it is 18 months since I started this blog.  I re-read my first ever post, which was tentative to say the least.
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2011/12/first-steps.html

So many fears; would anyone read it and would that matter? Would it make me vulnerable?
In fact, I have enjoyed blogging, and the best thing about it is the wonderful people I have encountered and met as a result.

In reflecting on my first steps. I came across a site which asked what one small step made a big difference in your writing career.

http://us2.campaign-archive1.com/?u=f8b16374ec668e8d6004fcc38&id=d982528be7&e=fb5467ce0f

This is hard to answer because there would an awful lot of small steps.  And some big ones.
I think that indie publishing to Amazon has certainly been the most fun, so far.

What about you?

Related post:
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/05/losing-your-blogging-mojo.html

Losing your blogging mojo?

If you are new to blogging or have been a long term blogger, there will be times when you lose your blogging mojo.  Overwork, stress, not enough hours in the day, boredom, loss of confidence, change of focus, not sure what to say - there are so many reasons we might re-evaluate our purpose.  So here is an excellent blog from the wonderful Jane Friedman that you should read.
http://janefriedman.com/2013/04/22/reasons-to-keep-blogging/

And if that wasn't enough, this link lists 35 excellent blogs for writers.  Happy blogging!

http://www.yourwriterplatform.com/blogs-to-help-writers/

Related posts:
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/05/losing-your-writing-mojo.html

Blogging V Writing?

Like many writers, I often consider the relationship between writing and blogging.  I enjoy blogging, which is, after all, writing. Right now, I enjoy blogging more than writing novels.  So I spend more time on it than writing novels.  Then I feel guilty because I'm not working on my novel.

I just came across this thought-provoking post by L.L.Barkat which asks the question, "Is blogging a waste of time for writers?"over  at Jane Friedman's excellent blog.
http://janefriedman.com/2013/03/15/its-time-for-many-experienced-writers-to-stop-blogging/

I'd love to know what you think.

Related post:
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/a-sense-of-community.html

What if? Guest blogging at The View Outside

Today you will find me guesting over at The View Outside asking the question, What if?

Writers are constantly asking “What if?” And after we have answered this question, it then follows, “What then?” This got me thinking about the choices we make, as human beings and as writers. One aspect of writing fiction that I love is that of problem solving...

Do visit The View Outside, a wonderful blog, to read the full post and comments - and add your own! 
http://the-view-outside.com/2013/03/16/jane-ayres-asks-what-if/

Versatile Blogger Award

I am grateful and delighted that two wonderful bloggers have nominated me for the Versatile Blogger award, namely:

Vikki at http://the-view-outside.com/ and 
Linda at http://excusemewhileinotethatdown.blogspot.co.uk/

Thanks, guys.  Sorry it's taken me a while to sort it out. So here goes.....

I have to state 7 facts about me.  Rather than adopt my usual random approach, I decided to be more focussed about this and concentrate on things that are meaningful to me.  I thought about words, and this led to thinking about letters and letter writing.  So my 7 facts all relate to letters that have significance in my life.

1.     When I was a child in the 60s and 70s, I was in love with Superman (he was a cartoon series, long before the wonderful Christopher Reeves films).  So I decided to write him a letter telling him this.  For some reason I thought he lived in a cave, so I addressed the envelope as such and popped it in the post-box.  Not sure what the Royal Mail did with it but strangely I never got a reply.

2.     My teen heart-throbs were actors Christopher Lee, Vincent Price and Peter Cushing. The latter was my biggest crush and I wrote him several letters over the years, simply addressed to Peter Cushing, Whitstable.  I got a reply and a signed photo, a treasured possession which I still have.  I didn’t get to meet him in the flesh until very many years later, by which time I was married. It was at a book signing for his autobiography at Waterstones, Tunbridge Wells and was a surreal experience.

3.     I wrote my first (unfinished) pony novel when I was 8 or 9 (in pencil in a large exercise book).  It was about two sisters searching for their stolen ponies.  They were at boarding school and when they set off on their pony quest, they made sure they took lashings of food with them (my favourite childhood books at the time were Enid Blyton’s Famous Five and Secret Seven adventures).  I wrote to publisher Armada, who produced most of the pony books I adored,  and asked them how many words you needed for a novel to be published and they replied politely with the answer “at least 40,000”. I kept the letter and when my first book was published by Collins Armada it was like a dream come true.   

4.     As you will have gathered I was an avid letter writer and I still enjoy writing letters.  As a child I had several penfriends, one in New Zealand.  We kept in touch well into adulthood when we were both married and she had children, and we got to meet in the UK eventually.  Anyone remember penfriends?  Do people still have them in this age of social media?

5.     I love receiving letters.  Now we use email I get a lot less but I would become so excited when the postman appeared, wondering what he might bring, and disappointed if nothing arrived. If I had to leave for school/work before the post was delivered it was quite frustrating. (Anyone recall when the first post arrived before 7am?  When there was a first post?)

6.     If you remember the days when you submitted to a publisher via snail mail you will recall saving and re-using large envelopes and stamps and queuing at the local post office to send off your precious manuscript and wait months for that familiar thud as your SAE returned like a boomerang - with a rejection slip. Or, conversely, the occasional surge of joy if the response was positive!

7.     Every time I had anything published, whether it was a letter to the local paper, an article, poem, story or novel, I always sent a copy of it to my Mum and Dad, wanting to share my success, however small, enclosing a handwritten note on a postcard or decorated notepaper.  After I lost both parents to cancer and was sorting out their house, I found every cutting I sent and every letter I wrote, all kept proudly in a drawer.  

I am nominating the following fabulous bloggers for the award:

http://joannegphillips.wordpress.com/

http://www.30daybooks.com/

http://www.lindsayburoker.com/

http://tahlianewland.com/

http://equestrianink.blogspot.co.uk/

http://theelephantinthewritingroom.blogspot.co.uk/

http://lindabenson.blogspot.co.uk/

Related posts:
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/fear-of-falling-failing-and-flying.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/a-sense-of-community.html

Fear of falling, failing and flying

Towards the end of 2012 my role of novice blogger changed.  Instead of feeling like an observer of the blogging community, looking from the outside in, I became a more active participant, engaging with and commenting on other blogs, and meeting virtually (and actually) with some wonderful people.   It’s taken me a year to achieve this.  What was I scared of? 

When I started my blog just over a year ago, I didn’t really know what I was doing with it.  It lacked focus and became a random collection of opinion pieces, advice I hoped was helpful to other writers, some diverse guest posts and the occasional ramble and rant.  A bit messy and untidy in structure.  More like the cluttered room than The Beautiful Room.

I started 2013 with the aim of being more focussed and structured, with specific days for themed posts.  That never really happened and my blog continues to be like my mind – overcrowded and haphazard. The only difference is that I am trying to be a bit braver about my inner thoughts. Previously, I’ve tended to shy away from revealing myself through my blog posts, yet most of the posts that I admire are the ones in which the writer isn’t afraid to do that, where what they write is personal and brave and authentic.  We all want to connect with other people.  It’s what life is all about.  It’s why we love to read, because we want to engage with realistic characters that resonate with us, that we can identify with. To show us that we are not alone in the world.

I recently read an excellent post from The Book Designer about blogging and I especially loved this phrase, which is so true and apt:

Before you’ve created your own blog, you don’t realize how much a blog is like a garden. In both you need to put in work up front, maybe a couple of years of it, before you start to get the benefits of a bountiful harvest.

Check out the post here

http://www.thebookdesigner.com/2013/03/author-blogging-101-whats-stopping-you/

Writing a blog is definitely a long term process.  You have to work to get results, to nurture it, to learn, and to be patient.  Gradually, if you do the groundwork, it will grow. And so will you.

Related post: 
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/a-sense-of-community.html

The Art of Time Management

My timekeeping and time management leaves a lot to be desired.  I try hard but it's a daily struggle.  When I started blogging just over a year ago, I sometimes thought I would never keep on top of everything that needed to be done, and now I am indie publishing my backlist, promoting, marketing, using social media such as Facebook and Linked In, there is more to manage.  It is on my list (and part of my marketing plan) to venture into the scary world of Twitter over the summer.  I enjoy all of this activity (although I don't seem to be working on the novel writing much recently!) but I am always open to ideas about how I can improve the way I structure my time.

So I found this post by Jane Friedman both refreshing and instructive. I love the title:
http://writerunboxed.com/2011/12/23/the-secret-to-finding-the-time-to-write-market-promote-and-still-have-a-life/

The advice is beautifully simple and highly practical.  As a big advocate of To Do Lists, I like the idea of having a Stop Doing list!  There is also advice on dealing with guilt, obligation, limiting certain activities, even if you enjoy them (maybe especially if you enjoy them!), being self-disciplined and improving productivity.

Essential reading for writers!

Related post:
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/time-to-write.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/publishing-writers-vanity-and-hypocrisy.html

The Liebster Blog Award

Thank you, Vikki, at brilliant blog http://the-view-outside.com/ for nominating me.  It really made my day.   I have discovered that "Liebster" is German for favourite. It's taken me a while to get this together but are the 11 Random Facts about me:

1.    I’m a classically trained singer but I haven’t performed publically for many years.  Plan to change this in 2013….

2.    I enjoy watching fantasy and supernatural series on TV.  Favourites include Grimm, Supernatural, Bedlam, Merlin and Once Upon a Time. And Primeval. Love the dinosaurs!

3.    Although I don’t drink alcohol I am partial to chocolate liqueurs….

4.    I developed asthma when I was eighteen.

5.    Pet hate is nuts in cakes.  And mayonnaise in anything.

6.    When I bake I substitute olive oil for butter/margarine.    Healthier and tastes great (but doesn’t work in flapjacks, as I discovered recently).

7.    Favourite smells are bergamot and patchouli.

8.    When I was a small child, I found some discarded razor blades on a rubbish pile and picked them up.  Ouch!

9.    Favourite films include Marnie, Rebecca (both Hitchcock), Gone with the Wind, Ladyhawke, Finding Nemo and Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Adventures.

10.  I’m a certified NLP Practitioner

11.  I can do the Argentine Tango.

Phew!  Next, my questions from Vikki:

And here are my 11 questions:

Q. Are you a punctual person or are you usually late?

Always late.  It’s my middle name and drives my friends (and me) to distraction.  I try hard to be punctual but if I find I can squeeze yet another last minute task out of those few spare moments between appointments, I do.  I claim I inherited a “being late” gene from my dear late mum!
Q. How many hours a week do you spend watching TV? Now come on, be honest!

Hard to say, as in the evenings the TV is usually on but I am on my laptop trying to multi-task.  So I am only half watching.  I like the soaps, Young Apprentice and generally tape Pointless!
Q. What do you wear in bed?

Nothing.  But I love sitting around in my big fluffy dressing gown and furry boot slippers.  Best outfit ever.
Q. In a heated argument do you walk away or keep at it until you’ve had the final word?

Depends on what the argument is about

Q.How many times a day do you look in a mirror? Come on, you can tell us.

In the morning, because my hair sticks up like a cockatoo!
Q. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

Groan, then hide under the duvet.
Q. Do you consider yourself lucky?

I don’t know what I think about the concept of luck. 
Q. What are your top 3 pet peeves?

Bullies in any form, selfish drivers and nuts in cakes!
Q. What character in The Wizard of Oz are you most like?

I only saw it once when I was little and to be honest I can’t remember the characters, but the dog was cute.

Q. How many pairs of shoes do you own?

I regularly shoe cull.  3 pairs of boots, 2 pairs of trainers, flip flops, some “going-out” shoes plus several pairs of pole dance shoes that I never get the chance to wear now. L

I’m delighted to say thank you to all the bloggers who continuously share what they know and what they learn with other writers. Without their generosity I probably wouldn’t have achieved what I have so far. I am nominating for the Liebster Award:

http://lindabenson.blogspot.co.uk/

http://joannegphillips.wordpress.com/

http://www.thecreativepenn.com/

http://excusemewhileinotethatdown.blogspot.co.uk/

http://ponybookchronicles.blogspot.co.uk/

http://artatwoodhouse.co.uk/blog/index.php

http://findingmycreature.wordpress.com

http://bookfutures.blogspot.co.uk/

http://www.bettyherbert.com/category/blog/

http://www.thefatpony.co.uk/latest-posts/

http://www.greatbooksforhorselovers.com/

  

Thank you all!  And if you accept my nomination, here are my 11 Questions for the bloggers I have nominated:

1.What is your biggest achievement so far?

2.If you could choose your own name what would it be?

3.Sun or snow?

4.What is your favourite book/s?

5. If your friends used 3 words to describe you, what would they be?

6.What was your childhood ambition?

7.What makes you laugh?

8.Chocolate fudge cake or doughnuts?

9.Who would play you in a film about your life?

10.What is your best quality?

11. If you could give advice to your 12 year old self, what would it be?

Here are the rules:

1. When you receive the award, you post 11 random facts about yourself and answer the 11 questions asked by the person who nominated you.

2. Pass the award onto 11 other blogs (while making sure you notify the blogger that you nominated them!)

3. You write up 11 NEW questions directed towards YOUR nominees.

4. You are not allowed to nominate the blog who nominated your own blog!

5. You paste the award picture into your blog. (You can Google the image, there are plenty of them!)

Backtracking: Lessons in Indie Publishing - Part 1 Marketing

In December 2011, I set up my blog and gave myself a year to see what effect it would have on the sales of my pony books.  It was probably the only thing I did towards creating my “author platform.”   Mistake number 1.  More of this later. 

Having been traditionally published for over 30 years, and with 20 years plus experience in marketing, you would think I would be in a strong position to indie publish my work and have an awareness of what is involved.  That’s what I thought.  However, I don’t think I was fully prepared for how it would take over my life. Mistake number 2.

Like most writers, I have a day job that pays the bills.  So imagine that you also want to start your own business in the hours that are left.  Self-publishing is essentially a business start-up.  Your book is your product.  You, the author, will be the brand.  Intellectually, I knew this.  How could I not?  Although I had my first story published in a magazine at the age of 14, most of my 30 plus fiction titles have appeared in translation (in 7 languages), in the UK and US I am virtually unknown.  So I did not have an existing audience to build on – rather like a new writer.  I had decided to publish three of my backlist titles for the kindle to raise funds for Redwings Horse Sanctuary.   I will add that this was a thoroughly considered decision, having been researching self-publishing for months (and I continue to do so).  There are some brilliant sites out there that will help you.  For example, I subscribe to  http://www.thebookdesigner.com/ which will also provide links to other useful sites and there is a great post on self-publishing and having realistic expectations on http://selfpubauthors.com/2012/10/04/why-you-might-not-be-succeeding-at-self-publishing/.

I commissioned a professional designer to create my cover designs as this is the first thing that potential buyers will see.  For a digital book, Amazon is your shop window. I worked hard on the descriptions of my books, as this is the next thing a potential reader will see. I hadn’t anticipated that I would end up rewriting them all several times, hopefully improving the content.  I would recommend Make A Killing On Kindle (Without Blogging, Facebook Or Twitter). The Guerilla Marketer's Guide To Selling Ebooks On Amazon by Michael Alvear for advice on this, as well as every other aspect of indie publishing for kindle.

Of course, before a buyer even gets to this stage in the process, they have to know your book exists and let’s face it, with a 6 figure number of indie published work on kindle, without even thinking about all the digital books from the big boys and girls and the corporate publishers with an impressive marketing budget, you really are a tiny, almost plankton sized fish in a vast ocean.  This can be very disheartening.  You are therefore recommended to create a “book buzz” and build an author platform at least 6 months in advance of releasing your book onto the world.  This can include using a blog, Facebook, Twitter (which I have not yet pursued – mistake number 3?), contacting reviewers, doing interviews, readings, giving away freebies, etc.  The list is endless and can be overwhelming.  Being impatient to see my books on Amazon, I foolishly published first and am now chasing my tail to promote the titles.  Ouch!  I will know better next time.

I am now doing guest blogs with specialist sites that target my readers, have learned about review sites and am trying to use Facebook more strategically to promote the books.  Getting reviews is proving a major hurdle, and I now understand why some writers have paid for this service.  In fact, one of the review sites I contacted told me they do charge to write honest reviews, because it involves a significant amount of time to read the title and then write about it, which is fair enough.  Thanks to the wonderful advice found on http://www.30daybooks.com/, I learned that there are sites that will promote your books on their free days, so I sent a blog to Digital Books Today, they published it and I was over the moon.  Being featured on the Carnival of the Indies on The Book Designer was also a major boost on many levels, and both sites have increased my blog traffic significantly. 

Because I was donating all profits from my books to charity, I decided that using the Amazon “free” days to promote the books would defeat the object of the fundraising. Mistake number 4. There are three books in the series and I have been told by several professionals that if Book 1 is free for a while (and readers enjoy it) they are more likely to buy the next two books in the series.  No sales = no funds for the horse sanctuary.  So later this month, I will be offering Book 1, Matty and the Moonlight Horse, free for 5 days. 

Similarly, I ignored all the advice I read on pricing strategy as part of the marketing plan because the money was going to charity and I wanted to raise the maximum amount from each sale.  Mistake number 5. Comparing the price I am charging to other similar titles, my book costs a lot more.  So now I am tweaking the prices and testing the market to see what works best. 

There are lots of freelance professionals out there who will help you with every stage of the process, from editing to marketing,  and if you do go it alone (like me) there is also lots of support in the indie community, both online and off, who are happy to share what they have learned. In some ways, writing and publishing your book is the easy part.  Selling it, however, is another story…..prepare to work your butt off.

Related posts: 

http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/taking-stock.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/adapt-and-survive.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/publishing-writers-vanity-and-hypocrisy.html

http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/validation.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/backtracking-lessons-in-indie.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/e-books-and-writing-for-children.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/breathe-indie-publishing-from-experts.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/backtracking-lessons-in-indie.html

Taking stock

There is currently a good deal of discussion about the idea of writers, especially those who self-publish, finding themselves pursuing a shadow career in developing their platforms at the expense of their writing.

(see the excellent  http://janefriedman.com/2012/07/31/extra-ether-shadowy-platforms/). 

Shadow career.  I like this term, which is apt in many ways.  In the 1980s-90s my goal was to have what was called a portfolio career – and at one point I was juggling 4 different jobs in order to write.  Recently, I heard another writer who self publishes refer to a mosaic career, which I rather like too.  A more splintered, myriad, maybe chaotic career.  This really did get me thinking. 

I’m relatively new to the blogosphere, having set up my blog in December 2011 with a certain amount of trepidation and after a good deal of research.  (Although, bizarrely, I published five posts on the same day.) I’ve also spent the last six months researching self-publishing, especially digital, with the help of some wonderful sites, http://www.thebookdesigner.com/ being a prime example.

I called my blog The Beautiful Room; a place for me to go to express my thoughts, ideas and concerns.  A creative space.  Eight months down the line, I decided to take stock.  What has it become?  I considered first the mixture of reasons I set up the blog:

·         To maintain a regular writing habit, i.e. most days, which I have always struggled with, despite being told by successful authors how important this is.  (I tend to write in chunks consisting of 3-4 day blocks of time whenever I can get fit them in round my job)

·         To express a viewpoint

·         To provide useful information for other writers

·         To raise my profile.  Although I’ve been published for many years, my work is mostly translated into other languages and comparatively little published in the English language

·         To provide a shop window – for Jane Ayres the brand and for my soon-to-be-published-on-kindle-by-myself backlist of titles that have long been out of print and deserve another airing. (the writer Kate Pullinger makes some interesting points  about the backlist and spreadable media on her blog http://www.katepullinger.com/blog/comments/spreadable-media/)

Phew!  Time to assess how successful I have been.  And how do I measure success? I looked at the following factors:

·         The time my blog has consumed

·         How much fun and enjoyment it has given me

·         Did it instil a daily writing habit?

·         Has it raised my profile and how would I know?

·         Finally, the acid test.  The stats.

Starting with the first on the list, the blog has consumed several hours a week.  Is this time that could have been spent writing my next book?  Yes and no.  I can blog while I have the TV on and I can’t always write my novel with too many distractions.  I now have a much more regular writing habit, although I don’t blog as often as I feel I should.  I do enjoy it and I have rediscovered the joy of writing opinion pieces, features and essays, which has resulted in me being a guest blogger for the creative website called Creatabot http://creatabot.co.uk/2012/07/10/tick-tock-by-jane-ayres/.  I enjoy reading other people’s essays as well as fiction.  You can think that your thoughts and ideas are totally original until you interact and find (via the internet) that probably millions of others are saying similar things.  And far more eloquently.  Self-doubt can set in.  Before the internet, you might have felt safe in your little cocoon.  It is both reassuring and challenging to make this discovery.

Has the blog raised my profile?  Probably not.  Why do I think this? Ah, the stats.

Sold more books?  I will have a better idea of that by the end of the year, when I hope my entire backlist is out there on the kindle (launching later this month).

Back to the stats.  Here’s the thing.  When I started the blog I was delighted to find there had been 3 views (most likely my friends!).  When I had 20, I shrieked with excitement.  As the numbers built, I was stunned to see that many came from as far afield as Russia and China (until my brother told me that’s where most of the phishing comes from.  Oh.  So these viewers weren’t necessarily interested in my actual content.)  As of today, I’ve had 1028 page views.

And this is the revealing bit, psychologically.  Those stats have an addictive quality, stimulating a need to boost those figures.  I want to be read.  Ouch!  I didn’t think it would matter to me but it does.  Maybe that’s because I’m a writer – or have a massive ego?  Is it better to blog and be little read than not to blog at all?   

What should your stats be? Or rather, what figure would make you happy?  A bit like chalking up Facebook “friends”.  Is it territorial pride or merely self-indulgence? 

I’ve given myself till the end of the year to make a decision about keeping my blog.  Is it worthwhile?  If I enjoy it, yes.  Is my enjoyment affected by the stats and the thought I may be writing in a vacuum?  I hate to admit it, but yes.  Does it matter?

All I know for sure is that since I started I have got a bit more confident with IT, learned a great deal about writing, a bit about myself and, with the help of all the wonderful writer bloggers already doing it well, I will continue to learn. 

Related posts:
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/adapt-and-survive.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/validation.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/backtracking-lessons-in-indie.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/e-books-and-writing-for-children.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/breathe-indie-publishing-from-experts.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/backtracking-lessons-in-indie.html

Equestrian Ink Guest Blog

I'm really thrilled to be guest blogger today on the wonderful Equestrian Ink site.  You can read "Sharing the Journey" here.

http://equestrianink.blogspot.com/2012/02/meet-jane-ayres-guest-blog.html

Blog stuff

Just trying to get to grips with blogrolls, following, and technical stuff....lots to learn....

On connections

I’ve been thinking a lot about connections.

The internet is all about connections.  As someone whose favourite place as a child (apart from the riding stables) was the library, the opportunities to explore and research and learn through the internet is what I find most exciting.  Your own, constantly evolving, library.  Amazing.

But the internet has spawned it’s most popular child, Facebook.  I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook.  Although it’s power and influence alarms me, I have a profile.  I post from time to time.  I like the way I can stay in touch with my friends and share events and thoughts with them.  It enables us to make connections and feel part of a community.  Humans need to feel connected.

We enjoy comedians when we can recognise the situations and emotions they describe.  I was watching Michael McIntyre the other night and I laughed because what he was saying was so familiar.  It’s the same with the writers we click with.  If they create characters that we can empathise with, we care about them.  We need to feel connected, part of something bigger.  To know we are NOT alone (although we are). It creates a necessary illusion.

Ironic that on so many levels humans have the tools to be more connected than ever before, yet on a deeper level we can feel disconnected.

More on this will follow, because as I approach my fiftieth year a number of interrelated topics demand my attention - as a writer and as a human being.

Journeys.  Connections.  Identity.  Purpose.

For most of my life I have set myself goals and targets.  I would feel adrift without them.  But recently I have realised that more important is purpose.  More elusive but offering a deeper level of satisfaction.    I haven’t identified my purpose yet but I will.  Soon.

Related posts:

http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/connectivity-and-communion.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/running-writing-and-living.html
http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2011/12/on-books-digital-landscape-and-bigger.html

Journeys and shapes

I was once asked about my need to document everything.  I had never thought about it directly.  Maybe it was a way of not forgetting.  That’s why I always make lists.  But it is more about remembering emotional states, situations.  Having proof.  In nearly 50 years of life I have experienced so much yet how much do I remember?  A tiny fraction.  That makes me sad.  I want to remember everything, to be able to access my hard drive whenever I choose.  It can be a struggle remembering a long way back, yet we might hear a piece of music or smell a scent and in an instant, it can open a door to access a long forgotten memory.  How amazing.

Everything we have done or felt shapes us.  The people we meet and how they impact on our lives.  Love and loss, pleasure and pain.  It makes us who we are and we are evolving constantly, incrementally.  As writers, who and what we are, all the baggage we have acquired or offloaded on the journey, finds a way consciously or unconsciously into our work. 

When I re-read work written years before, tiny details – a name, a turn of phrase – can once more evoke a situation, a person – and I retrieve a once forgotten memory. 

Writers are told in manuals and on courses to write from experience.  But we can’t help it.  That doesn’t mean it has to be literal but it often is.  Writing can illuminate, help us understand ourselves and the world. 

Life is a journey.  Writing is a journey. They are inextricably linked.

http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/for-journey.html

http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/more-on-journeys.html

http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/wheels.html

On people

Life is about the people we encounter.  People are interesting.  Their stories fascinate and engage us.  That’s why people love to watch soaps.  The novelists and scriptwriters that I admire most create convincing characters that make me care about them. 

I’m lucky enough to know some amazing, inspiring people.  I’ve put links to their sites on the right.  People with passion and determination to make things happen.  They walk the talk.

On ways to read a book

As a child I was taught that when you read a book, you start at the beginning and read right through to the end.  Even if it was boring and not engaging you.  Once you start a book, you don’t give up.  You do NOT peek at the last few ages to spoil the surprise.  That would be sacrilege.  I’m not sure how old I was when I started to cheat.  Late teens I think.  I was reading a book that I was finding hard work,  So I took a quick look at the last page to see if it was worth my persevering with the journey.  It was.  I realise that I am not usually a linear, sequential  reader.  I like to jump about when I read, dipping in and out of different sections.  I might start towards the end and then go back.  When I browse in a bookshop, I pick up the book that attracts me, and read the last few lines.  Then back a bit further.  Then the opening page.  Possibly a few pages from the middle.  Before I buy it.  I may take it home and read it straight through.  Or I may continue to dip.  Some of my friends and writing students are quite horrified at this way of reading.  Am I being disrespectful?

As a writer, how would I feel if my stories were read like this?  If my carefully constructed narrative and pacing leading up to the thrilling climax was sidestepped?  Interesting question. 

Books I have enjoyed over the past year include:

The Crimson Petal and the White - Michel Faber

Stephen King on Writing

Fire in the Blood by Irene Nemirovsky

Nocturnes by Kazuo Ichiguro

Status Anxiety by Alain De Botton

Consolations of Philosophy by Alain de Botton

Feel the fear and do it anyway by Susan Jeffers  (first read many moons ago - revisiting!)

On the go at present are Meditations of Marcus Aurelius and Rumblestrip by Woodrow Phoenix.

All of these books have taught me something new and that's why I love them......

Related post: http://janeayres.blogspot.co.uk/2011/12/on-books-and-reading-and-pony-books.html

First steps

It’s been a long time coming. 

I’m a writer.  Blogging is all about writing.  Expressing ideas on a very public platform.  I tell my writing students they should be blogging.  So why don’t I practise what I preach?  Why have I resisted for so long?

One reason I give myself is that I am not very good with technology. 

Another that I worry I might get addicted to blogging.    Or that I won’t be able to keep it up.

Or that no-one will read it anyway.  Oh well...... 

I’ve been a writer for more than 40 years but I still struggle to write.  When I teach and advise other writers I tell them how important it is to write every day.  Yet I don’t.  The older I get, the harder it gets.  A daily, or at least regular, writing habit has eluded me for a long time.  Maybe blogging will get me into that habit.  An ugly word, blogging.  Inelegant.  Diary or journal has a nicer ring to it.   Or maybe wordstream......